How to find the right therapist for you
Hey there! If you’re here, you’ve probably been thinking about therapy, and I just want to say—I’m so proud of you for taking this step. Finding the right therapist can feel a little intimidating at first (I get it, the Google searches alone can be overwhelming). But don’t worry, I’m here to walk you through this.
It’s a space all about you.
As an Asian American therapist, I know that therapy can come with some cultural baggage—maybe you’ve been told that you should just “tough it out,” or “talk to family instead.” While family is important, therapy is a different space. It’s a space all about you, your feelings, and your healing. No judgment, no pressure, just space to breathe.
So, how do you find the right fit? Let’s break it down:
1. Find Someone Who Gets You
Whether it’s shared cultural experiences, language, or values, it’s so important to feel understood. As an Asian American child of immigrants, I know the unique challenges that come with straddling different cultures, and how these can impact our mental health. When looking for a therapist, don’t be afraid to seek someone who gets these nuances. It’s totally okay to want someone who shares your background or who’s experienced the same societal pressures. Therapy should feel like you’re coming home to yourself.
2. Comfort Is Key
It’s natural to feel a little nervous during your first few sessions, but over time, your therapist should feel like someone you can really open up to. If you feel like you’re walking on eggshells or holding back, it might not be the right match—and that’s okay! You deserve to be comfortable enough to bring your authentic self into the room, even on days when life feels messy.
3. Therapy is Collaborative
Therapy isn’t a one-size-fits-all deal. It’s a partnership. A good therapist will work with you to set goals and find a rhythm that fits your life. Whether you’re working through anxiety, trauma, or cultural identity, your therapist should empower you to be in control of your journey.
4. Healing at Your Pace
You’re in charge of how fast or slow things go. There’s no rush to dig into everything at once. Healing isn’t linear—it has highs and lows, and that’s part of the process. Choose a therapist who respects your pace and doesn’t push you faster than you’re ready to go.
5. Trust Your Gut
At the end of the day, trust your gut. If something feels off, it’s okay to move on and find someone new. This is about you and your healing. Don’t settle for a connection that doesn’t feel right.
Whether you're navigating anxiety, identity struggles, or past trauma, finding a therapist who sees and supports you is a huge part of the healing process. If you’re in California and looking for a therapist who understands the balance of cultural expectations and mental health, I’d love to help. You don’t have to go through this alone.
Stay well, and take care of yourself. 💛